SHAINA HOFFMAN

Chicago is cleft wide open once again by the beautiful weather. 

My wonderful and generous employer provided me with a lovely lightweight single-speed Raleigh just in time for the season via a trade for a CD and some handmade jewelery (I definitely got the better end of the deal). What happened to my Schwinn Varsity from last season? Well, I rode it proudly into early February. One day when I simply could not stand the cold on an early morning ride to work, I locked it up and took a cab the rest of the way. When I went back two days later in the snow to retrieve it it was gone. That’s life. I spent a month or two with public transit and then the big Bus Cuts came. They cut the frequency of my to/from work bus (Ashland #9) in half and suddenly it was nearly impossible to get to work on time.

Anyways, I’m over the Bus Cut Blues. Thanks Jimmy!

What else? The week following my second acupuncture session was blissful. I cooked all my meals at home and saved a ton of money. I savored my time in the grocery store, choosing exotic vegetables and filling jars with bulk assortments of grains, dreaming about my aspirations to learn to cook interesting meals for myself. I stayed home and worked on my personal to-do list and achieved a new hope for a modest and domestic lifestyle. I bought flowers and kept the house sparkling clean.

This must have been incredibly annoying for my roommates as they kept on with our typical way of drinking and staying up late talking about life and making art. But alas! My “inner peace” did not continue for long. I am back to my usual self. The following week I reintroduced myself to a productive irregular sleep cycle and all the exciting events and people moving around this fascinating city.

It is too nice outside most nights to stay in anymore. There are too many people whose brains I haven’t picked, too many debates I’ve yet to have, too much live music I’ve never heard to sit around and get rested so I can make coffee better during Sunday brunches.

Of course, I have well for the wear. I am still going to see the interning acupuncturists, though I plan on cutting back to monthly appointments instead of weekly. I have successfully stopped ‘flipping my lid’ all the time. My anxiety is greatly diminished altogether, but I think it may be less a result of being pricked with tiny needles and more likely a product of the kind and patient discussions that I have had with the Docs.

They expressed to me the analogy: ‘you can treat the branch or you can treat the roots,’ then warned me directly and sternly ” All that we can do here to cool you off is nothing if you don’t first stop pouring so much heat into yourself.” This struck me to the core.

I have since cut back to only one cup of coffee a day, never more (this is down from 5 or 6). I drink moderately if at all. Now what is left is to smoke less cigarettes. Of course I dream one day of quitting, but I think that now is not the time. I can only expect quitting smoking, though it may eventually bring peace, can only cause more stress.

Anyways. I feel good, feel so happy everyday. I love Chicago so very much– the big neon signs for businesses, the alleyways under the elevated tracks, the film noir feeling of streets bustlin with people wearing fancy hats and fancy footwear.

I am becoming increasingly familiar with the many neighborhoods outside my own Wicker Park (Pilsen, Logan Square, Humbolt Park, Uptown…) and all the vibrant subcultures that inhabit them. For the first time the city seems smallish and close-knit despite its trouble and diversity.

And of course, the music in Chicago can not be beat. The Weirder Park General Store is ramping up for another sunny summer of happenings. We are ten times stronger now and ready to step cautiously onward. Our next show is on April 16th (just booked today) with local friends Rabble Rabble and their touring buds John the Savage and Doomstar. This will certainly be a rock show and nothing less.

I will try to keep this updated, but you know how it goes. I do what I can. Thanks for reading

I’ve been having some difficulty keeping my cool lately.  Just about everything sends me reeling into an angry accusatory fit of anxiety.  Perhaps it is conditions in my relationships and my work environment that have got me feeling so tense, but change takes time to make and in the meantime I must treat the symptoms. The last thing I want to do is remit to Western medicine and psychopharmacology, SO my good friend has recommended that I try Acupuncture.

She has been going for a few months for similar mood-related issues and has found great success. She took me to the Pacific Coast School for Eastern Medicine, right down the street from where I work. They started by asking me questions about seemingly non-related things : “Do you ever get strange achey pains in your abdomen or knees? When You get angry does your face get hot or can you physically feel the tension build inside of you? What does your stool look like? What are your most recent dreams?”

And they were completely fascinated by my tongue. Apparently different coatings, colors and textures can say alot about the immediate condition of my body. I’m in the process of reading up more on these things but in the meantime I’ve gotta jet… gotta be at work by 4.

Sorry again for the lack of posting. Hope that it won’t be quite so far between this and the next. Stay tuned.
<3

<3 Shaina

I woke up bright and early at 10 am yesterday to run around the city trying to persuade different government employees that I am who I say I am. I first went to the Social Security office in Logan Square, then the DMV in Central Chicago where they sent me to the SS office downtown, where they laughed in my face and told me to try something else.

I think my best bet in getting a new ID is calling the DMV in RI and asking them to fax a copy of my old one downtown. What a pain in my tucus. I need an ID by the 24th if I want to make good my ticket to Florida.

That’s right, folks. I’m getting out of this his windy city and onto sunnier shores. I’ll be going to Florida to see a whole boat load of family from the 24th-29th. I couldn’t be more excited… i just need Identification for my flight.

Anyways, I woke up fairly early, fairly shorted on sleep considering my late night. I took a nap later on after dinner. Laid down and I was out like a light. I woke up ready to start my day again at 3 am and watched a movie with Celia. She fell asleep and when the credits rolled I thought I’d give my bed another try.

I laid down and was wrapped in blissful thoughts of how lovely everything has been here in Chicago. I thought to myself ‘if a meteor crashed down through the ceiling and killed me instantly I could die happy with all the goodness I have had in this life.’

Then through the haze of my purring content I heard the whirr of my roomate nick’s space heater blasting away while he is fast asleep. I thought of how our electric bill must be tripled because he keeps it on full blast, even while unconscious, at least 12 hours a day.

You must be thinking WHAT THAT’S RIDICULOUS WHOS GONNA PAY FOR THAT. He’s not, that’s for sure. Despite my months of complaining and pettitioning for him to change his many selfish ways or move out, he has not changed nor has he ever paid rent in full and on time since living at Weirder Park.

The excessive heating thing is not something we can complain about anymore. Nick has been in and out of the hospital with pneumonia for the past week. His mother was here yesterday, returning him from the emergency room once again with an armload of vitamin water and hundreds of dollars of antibiotics and pain killers.


I came close to grabbing his mother by the shoulders, looking sincerely in the eyes and pleading “PLEASE, don’t let your sun leave me stranded with all of his debt. I have enough of my own.” Then I thought, she’s got hers too. My telling her how much heartbreak and anxiety, how many sleepless nights I’ve had over his apathy and irresponsible selfishness, would not make her feel good about her son and it likely still wouldn’t make him pay his bills.

And to you, blog reader, don’t bother telling me I need to get on this guys case like I don’t know. Believe me, I try. I am not the only other person who lives in this apartment, and surely not the only one who cares. My friends away from home all have been waiting for the day that this bloodsucking friend will remove himself from our lives.

You know, he does clean the house alot. Constantly, really. Like Celia says, he’s not just a bump on the log. BUT, if I could afford a maid, I wouldn’t have so many roommates.

Nick is supposedly moving out tomorrow, now that he has been out of work for two weeks with pneumonia and obviously can’t pay rent. He tried to tell me today that he won’t be paying rent for this month because he’s leaving as soon as possible. So suddenly. Six days into the month. Now that, for the first time in months, I don’t have people vying for a spot in this apartment, he is leaving. Does he expect us to find someone to pay his full months rent without actually living here for a full month?

Alright, enough complaining. What will I do now? It’s 7:30 in the morning and I can’t go back to sleep because I will give myself an ulcer tossing and turning about bills.

I guess I’ll just leave you with a photo… do you want one of me or of something absurd? well, lets see now.

I was riding past the high school on my way to the Barbara & Barbara gallery to drop off some work for the Self-Portrait show on Saturday night and I found this lil guy:

and just in time for the inclement weather. I hope that I never leave this lovely feller on the bus. I’m not sure if it’s a lady bug or a frog but I like it.

Went to another work birthday party last night, and my coworkers told me they went to see Alela Diane a few days ago.


They said that now that she has cut her hair, she’s lookin alot like me. One thing’s for sure, I love her music and I’d like to get my hands on some.

It’s been very nice in this digital age to know that new music is not something I need to save up money for. I know that when we finish packaging my CD, I’ll be giving away a lot of copies and selling some for 5 or 10 bucks. It’s music, it should be free. Fortunately, the entire production process may wind up costing us next to nothing.

So…. Celia and I have work in a Self-Portrait show at the Barbara & Barbara gallery, where they are celebrating their one-year anniversary. This is about as long as I’ve known these two ladies, whom I had first met when I worked as their door guy (read: muscle) at one of their first art openings. They listened to my music and asked me to play and now we’re good friends.

Barbara and Barbara are in fact Kara and Sierra, and they run a hair salon in the back of the gallery space. Kara is a licensed and phenomenal hair stylist with a great collection of vintage barber shop stuff and the nerve to ask most of her clients “How do you feel about asymmetry?”

Oh yeah

and the gas is back on!

Who knew that such little luxuries like heat and hot water could bring such comfort and life to our home? When I came home late last night, Celia was sitting at the bar and I at the kitchen table, taking off my coat because it was so nice and warm in my apartment, she said to me “If you want to take a hot shower, you should.” This is truth. I can and I should. I took a looooong baptismal hot hot shower and then curled up in bed with the Bits and a towel on my head. This is something I’ve been waiting to do for months.

Now its a pleasure to sit at my bar in my kitchen, eating applesauce and buttered toast, drinking hot tea and working away on computer. Celia and I are going to tackle the bathroom later today and clean everything top to bottom, maybe fix up a few things around the show room or even do some work on the moon.

Well ok, enough… i must be boring you.
go twitter or facebook or something.

love love love

I have met so many interesting ambitious young folks in the year or so that I’ve lived in this city, and my circles of new and old friends are always growing in fractals like a venn diagram.  I am tempted to sing the praises of the good folks I now know, but I think writing about others directly on the internet is probably a recipe for trouble.

I went to a show last night at the whistler and saw good friends from different ends meet for the first time and I can say that I expect nothing but good to come from them this winter.

Brett has finished mixing my album, and today I am sending an SOS to Laura Goldhamer, a good friend and music maker in Denver who just visited Weirder Park with Dovekins. I talked to her today via facebook chattin about how I envy the packaging of the 3 eps we received from her community label LONG SPOON. Here, I will show one off for you!



She has designed and made the die cut for this herself and says she can send me blanks for cheap to print on. I may be using this or making my very own. The idea is the sooner the better so as soon as I get some extra cash its going to album art. I’m very excite to send out some packages of love and music to friends and family across America.

Let’s see…what else?

We have a show at Weirder Park on Friday night that I am very excited for: Snacks, Bird Talk, and Mickey. These are three loud dirty bands and we expect to have a good crowd of nice people. The last show that we had on a Saturday night got pretty out of hand, so the bands will bringing their own security and we will have extra friends carding at the door and supporting the donation. I’m considering also setting a capacity, getting a door counter and sticking to it.

I am finished with my week’s vacation and I have mostly finished moving into the library (photos of my new room pending). I have tons of light all day long and I love waking up in the sun and lying around in the covers with the Bits (the cat).

Celia brought me home a potted rose bush the other day. She snuck it into my room while I was sleeping and put it in my window so that when I awoke I found a new sunny “Double Knockout.” This room is the prime spot to grow things so I will be working on changing my thumb from dun brown to olive drab.

Alright alright,

I will leave you with an image from Halloween (in case you haven’t seen it yet).

From Left to Right, that’s Sgt. Pepper, Fancy Lion, Lizard Lady, Russian Poet, and American Indian. We’re a thinking crowd.

more to come.

See what I found when I was lurking the hoffmanweb galleries of the past?

A smiling family photo!

If you had asked me two days ago what my plans were for the future, I would have told you absolutely for sure that I was moving out of my apartment immediately, that I had just lost my job and that I was starting a whole new life in this city.

No need. We cleaned up the place and made a plan on how to get our home back to start. I have a meeting with my managers at Uncommon Ground today and I’m sure they will tell me once more that I am an invaluable asset to our coffee program despite my persistent irresponsibility etc etc. Above and beyond all…. I’ve got a really cute cat and she knows how to make me feel better.

Just saying, I get by with a little help from my friends.

I was googling away the other night and I decided to pick on my sister and this is what I found:

This last one is definitely my favorite. I had originally posted these and more on facebook, and then I realized how creepy I was and I took them down. Still creepy no doubt but a little less public.

I went to go to a show tonight at the Mutiny, a dive music bar down the street from my apartment on Western Ave. I wanted to see Rabble Rabble and Ian and the Snacks, both bands that will be playing at Weirder Park in the coming month. Celia made a new flier today that packs a big punch: three shows on one flier:

this image doesn’t look too great but it’s something. She just whipped it up on the spot before going to work. I think a good flier will make the difference between us breaking even at a show and us making cash. We are hoping that we can work the shows at Weirder Park enough over the next few months to pay all our utility bills. What a wonderful way to make ends meet!

On a different note, my eyes are tired and I have lost yet another pair of glasses. This time I’m getting em and making it count. My friend gave me a pair of frames tonight that she said I could keep and use:

I learned while taking this picture it is difficult to rid oneself or computer screen reflections in lenses. These ones make me wanna sing “Peggy Sue,” which ain’t such a bad thing. My sister Heather called me today to say that she slipped a 50% off coupon for Lenscrafters in the mail today. I plan on getting a thorough eye exam and getting rid of my needy vision in no time flat.

I am hoping that forementioned package also contains my birth certificate. With it, I could possibly attain a Chicago state ID, and then I could get into 21+ venues to support bands that support us. Tonight, I was denied at the door, and understandably so. Hopefully my proof of identity will be ready to go by Halloween.

Celia’s birthday is coming up. She has asked us explicitly not to celebrate, even though we have a big show that night. I’m not sure why but I will respect her wishes, and there will be no funny business with cake or presents or anything. I do know for sure that if I had a birthday that went uncelebrated I would feel pretty bummed out. Fortunately, my sister and I do ti up right every year. Perhaps we should celebrate an un-birthday this year?

Right now Celia is on the moon (that’s what we call our room because it is so far away from the rest of the apartment). She is watching a VHS cassette that we found titled “50 Greatest Cartoons.” I think its time I curl up in bed and travel back to the time of Tom and Jerry. Goodnight for now.

I’ve not been one to surf the internet unnecessarily in the past, but I am known to get myself into a string of google searches from time to time.

Why not take advantage of my acquired search engine skills and find out what the pretty wide web has to offer? We have found that occasional googlings of the varous Weirder Park appellations brings returns of interesting bloggings and write-ups, etc. When I search for myself I mostly find links from this blog and my various networking site profiles.

Today I finally found an image that a photographer from the Chicago Sun Times had taken of my friend and I when we were in my windowsill:

This must have been taken right before Christmas time last year, and I remember peeling back the plastic from the windows so we could go out for one last hurrah.

I got a call from my good friend Cate Giordano today while I was riding my bike home from work around 11pm. She will be passing through Chicago a twice around Christmas time this year and I can’t wait to play music with her again.
Its been over a year and she has been staying in Brooklyn after returning from a long stay in Korea where she was teaching English. She has been working with film maker friends in NY and she is one hell of a songwriter.

I imagine we may have a small show but I think the city might evacuate once again for the holiday season. I imagine that it is very preemptive of me to even think about December when the weather is so nice this late in October.

I imagine it’s pretty late now and I’ve finally wound down from work and good weather. I think I’ll curl up with this paperback book

I’m an incredibly slow reader and sometimes I feel I have an incredibly thick skull about reading non-fiction. I think about my registrar friend who told me that one day he just gave up on reading fiction. He said that he found tales from reality more entertaining and that the knowledge reaped is substantial and more rewarding etc etc.
I must admit, I love my fiction. Last winter I curled up with The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay by Michael Chabon, then Confederacy of Dunces for a while. Over the summer I rotated through Haruki Murakami short stories, fiction from the New Yorker, and some Tom Robbins.

My mother used to plow through paperbacks in a genre she coined ‘laundry reading,’ which consists of trashy romance novels and neon-covered chick lit paperbacks with the occasional book club nominations and Harry Potter new releases. I asked her how she learned to read so fast and she said that eventually you learn to get the gist of things without acknowledging .every. period or, comma “or quotation mark.”

I never learned to read so fast, but it doesn’t mean I don’t read often. This impending season also means that I’ll be spending more time on the bus, and it will be necessary to have at least one book at all times. Otherwise, I will resort to the local daily rags.

Alright, I’d love to elaborate but this has become one especially late night especially ramblin ramble. Books and bed time. more to come.

It took a while for things to get going here in Chicago but now at the end of a very productive summer this city and I are getting along swimmingly.

We’ve had a dozen or more shows here since the grand opening of the Weirder Park General Store in April–two Fests, farewell and homecoming shows, and friends from all corners of America– and nothing but good fortune has come through our door with it all. We’ve had the pleasure of hearing the music of old favorites from Boston and New York, new friends in our city, and several touring bands that we had never had the opportunity to meet before playing right here in our smelly abode.

I’ve tried to count how many and when, but I think the task is too much for one resident to muster. I can say with truth however that every one has been a great experience.

I performed a handful of shows last month: a wedding, a solo show, and a four-night showcase of female singer/songwriters at the andersonville location of uncommon ground. I will be playing tomorrow night again at the clark st location (where I am also currently employed). Each gig is a paying one in some way, which is a bonus bonus bonus.

I am also currently recording a solo album in a small practice space in Logan Square thanks to my friend and producer/sound designer Brett Borden. Hopefully Celia Rose Marks is in the process of designing an album cover and the pieces are slowly but surely coming together; I’ve got a whole handful of brand new songs from the summer and fall. Most of the tracks are acoustic but I have fooled around with a fine electric guitar and hope to add some other schtuff in the studio soon.

Now that things are finally slowing down and looking alot like
I think I’ll be writing on the computer alot more, mostly just so I can tell someone about my day and my big big plans, but also because friends and family (probably you if you are reading this now) have gotten on me about bloggin more. Sure, I’ll blog plenty more but please, I can’t promise consistent or interesting or consistently interesting content.

Also, if you’re reading about what I’m up to, I’d love to hear about you. Yes, YOU! Shoot me an email or post me a comment and let me know what you really think about me and you and whats happening in America and in our lives, about us growing old and everything else… anything honest and No ‘warm hugs,’ ’special dreams’ or smiling hearts allowed. Meaning is good. So is Sam Cooke.

So, more blogging on its way. I’ll try and post more video/photos is possible and keep you filled in on what’s going round. We have 9 shows in the next two months and we are currently hosting our first Artist in Residence: Daniel Deluca, so there should be a plenty to tell.

Right about now I’m going to head out to Home Depot to get a new hammer (ours has gone a-missing). Maybe I’ll stop off at the video rental place and drop off some over due movies, stop to pick up some coffee and then head to the library for the job hunt. more to come.